Pakistan Today

On scientific enthusiasm

by Hasan Aftab Saeed , (Last Updated 15 mins ago)

And rather charming lies You would have encountered science enthusiasts who have let their enthusiasm get the better of themselves. This type of a person believes that science, even if it hasn’t…

Need to balance the priorities

by Editorial , (Last Updated 23 mins ago)

Rising graph of coronavirus deaths There is a need to preserve people from dying of hunger. There is an equal need to protect them from death caused by coronavirus. One can appreciate the government’s concern for…

Cartoons

Today’s Cartoon

by Syed Shahzeb Ali , (Last Updated 9 mins ago)

Foreign

Multiple Taliban attacks kill 27 Afghan security personnel

by Agencies , (Last Updated 10 mins ago)

KABUL: Taliban insurgents have killed 27 members of the Afghan security forces, police and government officials said on Monday, as a peace effort brokered by the United States struggles to get off the…

Featured

Spoiler: the politician is a douche

by The Tube , (Last Updated February 1, 2020)

I get it. Militaries the world over make PR films. One cannot hold this fare up to higher standards of art. It is, literally, propaganda. One cannot expect an American film, produced…

Sports

Tokyo organisers eye July 2021 for delayed Olympics: reports

by Agencies , (Last Updated 1 day ago)

TOKYO: Tokyo Olympics organisers are eyeing next July as a start date for the postponed Games, Japanese media reported Sunday, following the historic decision to delay the event due to the coronavirus.…

Lahore

Buzdar approves Rs10 billion Punjab CM Insaaf Imdad Package

by APP , (Last Updated 23 mins ago)

LAHORE: Punjab Chief Minister (CM) Sardar Usman Buzdar on Monday approved the Rs10 billion for the Punjab CM Insaaf Imdad Package. Chairing a meeting here at his office, the chief minister directed…

Karachi

Halting waste disposal work in Karachi added risk during pandemic

by Staff Report , (Last Updated about 1 hour ago)

KARACHI: The National Forum for Environment and Health (NFEH) on Monday expressed serious concern about the municipal waste disposal work had come to a virtual halt in several areas of Karachi during the…

Islamabad

CDWP approves various development projects for capital

by APP , (Last Updated about 1 hour ago)

–Recommends four projects of Rs133bn to ECNEC ISLAMABAD: A meeting of Central Development Working Party (CDWP) on Monday approved two projects in the federal capital, worth Rs466.264 million, and recommended four projects,…

Arts / Entertainment

Hareem Farooq Brought Empathy, Music, and a lot of Introspection to her Instagram Live!

March 28, 2020

These are indeed testing times. In these moments, we look for small moments of joy to laugh in the face of adversity and relax for a while. Film producer and actor Hareem Farooq has been providing a form of entertainment...

Corona Lockdown: cleaner environment leads to Eagle, Bichu Gangs reappearing in Vasco City

March 30, 2020 BY The Dependent

In one of the ways the natural world is making a comeback as a result of the falling carbon footprint and commercial activities due to the Corona lockdown, the Eagle and Bichu gangs have been seen returning to Vasco City. “Yes, we were also surprised,” said Faye D’Souza, resident of Vasco City. “It had been quite a while since we’d seen the tightly choreographed dance-fight sequence between these two gangs. Now, I guess all that is back.” “We’re back to not having even a balconies concert without there .....
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‘Good particles who have been wronged’ – Hamza Ali Abbasi defends coronavirus

March 28, 2020 BY The Dependent

ISLAMABAD – Hamza Ali Abbasi is the first celebrity, human, and living creature to defend popular viral infection COVID-19, after multiple video trended on social media of people, authorities, countries and the entire world bullying the particles of the virus. The coronavirus, or COVID-19, has been declared a pandemic by the World Health Organisation (WHO), with global attention dedicated to its elimination. The actor-turned-whatever-he-feels-like-on-a-given-day Abbasi, who is known for giving opinions that no one has asked of him, speciali .....
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Ban on religious congregation against religion, says ‘community leader’ that is clearly COVID-19 wearing fake glasses and moustache

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

Speaking to reporters in its first ever press conference, ‘Chaudhry Sagheer Ahmed’, who identified himself as a ‘community leader’, said that the ban on religious congregations shouldn’t be imposed. “It is extremely distressing that such blasphemous (and violative of human rights) steps are even being seriously considered,” said Ahmed, who was quite clearly the COVID-19 virus wearing fake glasses and moustache. “Yes, some countries have taken this step, but should we ape anything and everything the west - or east - does?” .....
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PSG sign deep-lying playmaker to bolster Champions League bid

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

PARIS – Paris Saint-Germain have announced the signing of deep-lying playmaker, and diverse attacker, Aamir Liaquat on a five-year contract. The Ligue 1 champions made the announcement on Tuesday. “We are delighted to announce @AamirLiaquat, the 48-year-old personal attacker and deep liar, has signed a five year contract with @PSG_English!” tweeted the official PSG English language handle. The renowned player, who can play as a televangelist, scholar, comedian, actor and politician, on either left or right wing – or even down the .....
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Postponed Tokyo Olympics to include contactless sport Chiri Uri

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

TOKYA/LAUSANNE –After confirming the postponed of this year’s Tokyo Olympics to 2021, the International Olympic Committee (IOC) has further decided to headline the event with the inclusion of popular South Asian sport ‘Chiri Uri’. In a statement, IOC said the decision was taken keeping in mind the aftereffects of the coronavirus pandemic. The committee maintained that Chiri Uri’s contactless nature ensured that it is given prominence. The IOC further underlined that, should there come such a need, it is also the only sport which ca .....
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Maria B launches ‘Mera Piya Ghar Aaya’ khaki collection

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

LAHORE – Fashion mogul Maria Butt, aka Maria B, launched her latest lawn collection on Friday, entitled ‘Mera Piya Ghar Aya’ – a tribute to her husband who successfully initiated a revolution against the oppressive forces, on behalf of the entire demographic that the couple belongs to. Channeling the trademark charm, grace and superficiality, Maria B’s latest collection was conspicuous in its use of the khaki colour throughout, harmonising the grandeur and elegance of the liberators of the nation – and of her husband. Along wi .....
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Infected Third Jinn of Bushra Bibi transmits COVID-19 to supernatural world

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

UNDISCLOSED LOCATION – There is panic inside the Prime Minister’s house these days, sources revealed to this scribe in a Telegram message. Bushra Bibi’s favourite Jinn, also known as her Third Jinn, has been seen having dry cough, fever and body aches for the last few days. Testing done at the National Institute of Health in Jhanda Chichi revealed that he had contracted COVID-19. This is the first reported instance in the world of a jinn contracting COVID19. With the case underlining the transmission of COVID-19 from the human to th .....
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Unaired bit from Tariq Jamil’s ARY appearance sees him describe PM as voluptuous, curvaceous hoor

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

LAHORE – Renowned cleric Tariq Jamil was invited on ARY on Sunday where he offered prayers amidst the COVID-19 pandemic. Jamil’s appearance on the show hosted by Waseem Badami also saw him back Prime Minister Imran Khan amidst the criticism he has been getting in recent days with regards to his inaction over the spread of coronavirus. While the show was widely viewed and garnered high ratings, The Dependent has learnt that a two-minute footage from within the show wasn’t aired. The footage, available exclusively with The Dependent, see .....
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Govt dissolved after ban on unnecessary gatherings

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

ISLAMABAD – As Pakistan continues to observe partial lockdown to counter the coronavirus pandemic, with unnecessary movements remaining halted across the country, the government has also decided to dissolve itself. The decision goes with the orders issued to ban unnecessary gatherings. According to sources, the summary of the decision has been prepared and will be presented before the federal cabinet in the next session, which will not take place since the cabinet and the parliament have naturally been dissolved. Pakistan Army and secur .....
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Federal govt awaiting fatwa that allows it to save human lives

March 27, 2020 BY The Dependent

ISLAMABAD – President Arif Alvi urged Islamic scholars to take urgent action and issue a fatwa allowing federal government to curb the spread of coronavirus in Pakistan. The president made the request after Grand Imam Shaikh of Jamia Al Azhar and Supreme Council in Egypt issued a fatwa regarding the matter, saying that it is okay for the government to save human lives, especially in the middle of a health crisis. President Alvi, who has approached the scholars for guidance, said the religious scholars should act urgently given that a pa .....
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Hoarding of dog feces starts after health ministry typo says dog feces might fight COVID-19

March 26, 2020 BY The Dependent

Fights broke out all across Pakistan over attempts by citizens to hoard dog feces after a typographical error in a Ministry of Health tweet gave the impression that said feces are effective in fighting the Coronavirus. “Yes, I know I should be responsible and save some of this stuff for others,” said Saleem Bhatti, a resident of Lahore, while scooping up some of the waste left by a stray dog. “But I also need to watch out for myself.” Plus, its price might go up and well, the market’s the market,” said th .....
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Haha, it was all just a social experiment, sillies, says nervous Maria B

March 26, 2020 BY The Dependent

A nervous Maria B has revealed in a latest online video press conference that the recent episode involving the arrest of her husband by the Punjab Police did not, in fact, take place, and it was actually a social experiment. “Do you think I’d be this inhuman, guys? That I would let my cook, who serves us every day, go on a bus back to his hometown on a bus, all the while infecting everyone along the way,” she asked, while nervously giggling. “Haha, no, of course, not.” “This was all just a social experiment .....
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