The power of the pen

The most important question, it seemed, was whether the children occupying the cable-car in Alai, which is a tehsil of Battagram, which is one of the more mountainous districts of KP, would be rescued. I wonder if that dramatic event was the inspiration for the reports of the rescue of Imran Khan from Attock Jail, by a team of commandos who came by helicopter. They did something they don’t even do in the movies: knocked out all opposition, but left them all alive.

There were two other reports of interest. One was that Imran Khan had not gone to jail. A homunculus or simulacrum had been built before his arrest, and that had gone to jail. Imran had been smuggled out to Scotland, or somewhere with equally remote wild and uninhabited places. The other, the one I prefer the most, is that Mrs Imran got one of her genies to replace him. Again, he is free as a bird, but in a remote place.

Unfortunately, it seems he’s still in the same place. Unlike the President, he’s not in a gilded cage. The incumbent is in really bad shape, after accusing his staff of not obeying his orders. He’s tried to transfer the Secretary to the President, but he stays untransferred. Their meetings must be awkward, to say the least. The President probably relies more on his Military Secretary these days.

I wonder if there’s any truth in the rumour that Ms Humaira Ahmad refused to take the job because there was no proof that the President had asked for her. When it was pointed out that he had signed the letter, she said the signature might be forged. When it was suggested to her that she talk on the phone with him, she asked for proof that it was not a homunculus or genie speaking, like the one imitating Imran. That was when the attempt was given up, and Dr Alvi left to his own devices.

Now that the dust has settled somewhat, it seems the bills are still lying unsigned on the President’s desk. The statutory period he could delay the bills being over, the government notified the acts. If the President had really wanted to make things sticky, he could have scribbled an objection or two, and sent it to the National Assembly Secretariat. Then the bills could only have been passed by a joint session of Parliament. A joint session needs elections.

So the changes, which apparently are bad for Imran, (or rather the simulacrum who’ll actually be tried) would not affect him (or rather the genie).

I wonder why we don’t have more simulacra or genies wandering around. I mean, they’re awfully convenient. The cable car occupants were rescued, without any claims of genies being rescued. Luckily, there were no small children, or else some kid would have tried a jump. True, it’s only by such experiments that we got out of caves, but small children do need the attention of the Almighty, otherwise Mankind wouldn’t be around today.

I wonder if someone will offer the explanation that the Indian moon landing was faked. Well, there an active domestic industry in the USA which claims that the moon landings were faked. Well, we’ve had an arms race which has not only left both India and Pakistan nuclear powers, but has given a lot of people ideas. I wonder how a space race would end?

Instead of celebrating a win in the space race, we are busy protesting power bills. And nothing shows more that the caretakers intend to stay than their reaction, which is the time-tested way of making sure that the problem is not solved, but on the way to oblivion. They’re holding a meeting. Now the only surer solution of the problem is the right noting on the file. Imagine someone in a mob, suddenly to be faced with an earnest-looking clerk with an open file in hand, pointing to the note that Sahib has scribbled on it.

Well, that protester would probably refuse to look at it, asking how was he to know the signature was not as forged as any President’s signature assenting to a bill.


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