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Industrial Revolution to blame for sexual harassment, reveals Hamza Ali Abbasi

ISLAMABAD – In a definitive research paper written entirely on social media website Twitter, scholar, researcher and scientist Hamza Ali Abbasi proved that the main cause behind sexual harassment is the post Industrial Revolution world order.

“It is undisputed that the reported cases of sexual harassment before 1760, all of the history before it, is significantly less than the cases after 1840,” the research paper on Twitter read. “Now you know what happened between these years? Let me tell you illiterates, it was the Industrial Revolution #CheckMeOut #IknowEverything” the paper added.

The research concludes that since there is such a great disparity in the cases before and after that time, it is Industrial Revolution that is at fault for harassment cases.

“It was the technological advancements during the Industrial Revolution that resulted in the kind of weapons that made the two World Wars as deadly as they were #OhYeah,” the paper continued. “That in turn prompted female participation in war, considering that the men were dying left, right and centre, and in turn brought the two sexes to such closeness where harassment becomes inevitable #TakeThatLiberals.”

The paper also revealed that following the Industrial Revolution, when men and women had to work together, men found it difficult to understand whether or not certain actions of theirs were a part of their job description or not.

“I mean think of a male machine operator, who is also making inappropriate remarks at a female coworker. How can he really tell whether that inappropriate behaviour is really a part of his job or not? #ShooLiberals”

The paper concludes by saying that only when humankind undoes the impacts of Industrial Revolution can harassment be curtailed.

“P.S by Industrial Revolution I do not mean the revolution in the Pakistani film industry, which when it comes to gender issues was epitomised by my role in Jawani Phir Nahi Ani #WatchJPNA”

The Dependent

The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.

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