Paulo Coelho goes missing after Balochistan tweet

GENEVA/TAFTAN: A man self-identifying as an author and lyricist from Brazil, going by the name of Paulo Coelho, has gone missing since Monday night. The man, believed to be an undercover agent working

The Dependent

The Dependent

August 19, 2020

1 min read
Paulo Coelho goes missing after Balochistan tweet

GENEVA/TAFTAN: A man self-identifying as an author and lyricist from Brazil, going by the name of Paulo Coelho, has gone missing since Monday night. The man, believed to be an undercover agent working under the garb of being a writer, has not been seen since his menacing tweet to Balochistan.

The Dependent’s investigations have revealed that Coelho, who has spent over four decades camouflaging as an author, finally unveiled his allegiance by openly threatening to send explosive material to the volatile and sensitive province of Balochistan.

“As you can see the fifth generation warfare is now completely out in the open. This is a classic case of a second-generation person undertaking the fifth generation warfare. They’re openly threatening to educate Balochistan,” a security officer privy to the abduction informed The Dependent.

“Notice the language they are using: openly asking their agents to send TNT for anti-state cells being constructed in Balochistan,” he added.

Furthermore, intelligence sources have revealed that Coelho might have been involved in many terror raids in Balochistan and the rest of the country in recent years, including the foiled Karachi Stock Exchange raid in June.

“During the Karachi raid we found a terror guide called ‘The Pilgrimage’. The raid signified a pilgrimage for the attackers from their original area to the target. The terror literature also spoke of a group Regnus Agnus Mundi, or Ram – now I don’t need to tell you what ‘Ram’ signifies,” a senior security officer involved in the investigations into the Karachi Stock Exchange raid confirmed.

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The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.

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