Internal classified documents of the United Nations made available exclusively to The Dependent reveal that the recent controversial viral video of a couple performing objectionable acts in public in a UN vehicle were actually commissioned by the organisation itself. Despite the UN Secretary General’s expression of ‘shock’ at it.
“This is to be a performance art piece,” wrote UN Secretary General António Guterres in the internal memo. “To that effect, of course, a performance artist has to be hired and the services of said lady have already been acquired.”
“So we will have the…event, if you will….filmed from above with a cellphone by an Assistant Under Secretary General,” the note continued.
“This will dispel the horrible impression that our organisation is ‘impotent’,” he wrote. “What an atrocious idea!
“This is subliminal messaging. The world will know that we at the UN still got our mojo, in fact, almost as much as the World Bank, yessir!”
“Now, on to the topic of who the gentleman in the video will be. Well, I’ve been told no one within the organisation is up to the task, so we will have to outsource this role as well.”
