February 1, 2020

After Iran attack and ‘peace plan’, Trump to leak new locker room talk to boost presidential bid

WASHINGTON – After executing Iranian commander Qasem Soleimani along with increasing the hardline approach in trash-talk against Iran, followed by the unveiling of a ‘peace plan’ for Israel and

The Dependent

The Dependent

February 1, 2020

After Iran attack and ‘peace plan’, Trump to leak new locker room talk to boost presidential bid

WASHINGTON – After executing Iranian commander Qasem Soleimani along with increasing the hardline approach in trash-talk against Iran, followed by the unveiling of a ‘peace plan’ for Israel and Palestine, US President Donald Trump is looking to take further actions traditionally considered to enhance changes of reelection, sources within the White House have informed The Dependent.

The Trump camp, which has long been preparing for its reelection bid, despite the impeachment looming over the president, has now decided to leak an audio featuring Trump to bolster his reelection bid ahead of the 2020 Presidential Elections.

“The moment we realised that we had won the election [in 2016] we began preparing for the reelection, even before entering the White House,” revealed a close aide of Trump who worked on his 2016 election campaign.

“We started closely looking into what previous presidents had done, and what made them successful in the second elections. That’s where the war-mongering approach in Iran, but at the same time a strategy that could pass as peaceful in Israel-Palestine, came,” the aide added.

Sources, however, have further revealed that despite the Trump election managers looking into the previous successes over the past three years, they have recently decided that they had been overlooking the single greatest triumph in all of US history.

“I mean if you’re going to look into the past, there is no greater accomplishment than our own election campaign. That’s when we decided when need another audio leak of locker room talk that is ideally sexist, anti-immigrant and perhaps even white supremacist,” another Trump aide told The Dependent.

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The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.

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