- How to outlast the lockdown
It started out like a case of pneumonia, which with its rapid spread followed by research and investigation turned out to be a new strain of virus. The Covid-19. Sooner than later it went from being an epidemic to a pandemic.
Schools closed their gates, shops pulled their shutters down, and lights in the malls went out. Humans, once called the social animals, locked their doors. Social isolation became the new trend.
Welcome 2020
It’s as if Mother Earth had enough of us and called a ‘timeout’. But being the undisciplined, unchecked children that we are, it is hard to sit in our naughty chair.
I won’t be discussing the affects this tiny virus has had rather. I want to talk about our ‘time out’.
One major thing these social distancing and lockdowns have brought with them is uncertainty. People don’t know what will happen next; to their jobs, their businesses, their future. Not knowing what’s ahead makes one feel less in control. No one likes to not be in control of their lives. The uncomfortable inability to plan ahead and lack of control is bringing up all kinds of fears and emotions in people.
While we take that in and deal with the uncertainty of what’s next; one of the most important questions that comes up is how are we showing up as persons?
No matter how severe the lockdown no one can take away our freedom to choose our attitude. Think about this for a moment; can you feel your power?
Are we reactive? Is grief taking over? Distant learning is taking its toll? Work from home feels like never ending work? Is frustration taking over?
When everything seems to be out of control, a normal reaction would be to try and control something which you actually can, and that is yourself. This self-control might feel suffocating at times and may at times lead to actually feel like breaking down. A better way would be to focus on self-management instead of self-control.
A few days back I was discussing “self-control” with my instructor and coach (yes even coaches need coaching), she pointed out to me, that self-control makes one feel as if we have a switch somewhere which can be switched on or off anytime and “self-management” would be a better word to use instead.
It struck me then that just by switching a word from one to the other suddenly a space opens up for personal growth. We are not robots. We have a range of emotions and experience them in varying degrees. No wonder the word “anger” has so many synonyms: “furious, mad, rage, annoy, irritated”. All these words describe one emotion so to say but also depict the varying degrees of it.
We more or less behave like waves having crests and troughs, hence like a surfer we need to learn to ride these waves rather than be drowned by them.
Managing our state of being with regards to the corona situation will involve a lot of courage on our part. This, we all have in ourselves; all we need to do is look inside us. Maybe a little deeper or longer but you’ll find it there. Here are some useful tips to think about and assimilate with yourself to make it easy for you and for those around you.
Step Outside─ not the house but yourself: Every time you feel like you’re getting angry or frustrated, take a deep breath and step out of yourself. Try to look at yourself with the eyes of an outsider. It might not stop you from releasing that anger the first time you do this, but it will start giving you a perspective which will slowly start helping you in managing your state of anger in a way which does the least damage according to the situation of course. Remember there are times when even anger is a useful tool to use.
Wear the shoes of another: When you find yourself being irritated by another, try for a minute to step into their shoes. You can do it literally if you want. but if not do it in your head and ask yourself what would they be feeling right now? What difficulty might they be facing today for them to act this way? More times than not you will realize your anger or irritation was misguided and it will help you create a happy place not just for you, but for the other as well.
Keep a pair of Rose-coloured glasses at hand: A trait of an optimist for sure but good to keep at hand for anyone trying to look out the window. You can don this pair of glasses almost every day right after your morning routine. Whatever your mind perceives; it deems a reality. Analyze your situation and take out the best lesson that you can learn from it. How best can you use it to your benefit? Keep in mind no matter what happens, you are responsible for your life and are in charge of making the best possible decisions for yourself. Yes, even in a lockdown!
Thank you is a magic word: Young kids are always taught that “thank you” and “please” are magic words and indeed they are. Practise saying thank you at the end of the day about all things that went well or you have. For this you can make a Gratitude jar or keep a gratitude journal. Every day write down three to things which you are grateful for. You can even make this a family ritual. It could be as simple as eating a bar of chocolate. As you keep doing this every day you will start forming a positive attitude and your focus will shift from what you don’t have to what you have.
These are a few ways which can be easily implemented in your daily routine yet they will bring about a huge change in your lives. Every minute that we show up we are choosing our attitude, our thoughts and emotions and are projecting them.
A very famous man once said: “Everything can be taken from man but one thing. The last of human freedoms- to choose ones attitude in any given set of circumstances.”
Viktor Frankl.
So no matter how severe the lockdown no one can take away our freedom to choose our attitude. Think about this for a moment; can you feel your power?