Murderous lawyers hope state treats them like terrorists

LAHORE – Amidst calls that the lawyers who had attacked the Punjab Institute of Cardiology in Lahore be charged under the Anti-Terrorism Act (ATA), the arrested lawyers following Wednesday

The Dependent

The Dependent

December 12, 2019

1 min read
Murderous lawyers hope state treats them like terrorists

LAHORE – Amidst calls that the lawyers who had attacked the Punjab Institute of Cardiology in Lahore be charged under the Anti-Terrorism Act (ATA), the arrested lawyers following Wednesday’s murderous rampage agree that the state should treat them like terrorists.

Still uncertain about the punishment that would be meted out to them following the ugly scenes in the capital of Punjab, the arrested lawyers are confident that their actions do merit charges of terrorism.

“We’re really hopeful that the state would make excuses on our behalf and excuses to not take action against us. We wish that the powers that be realise that this is what we deserve – we deserve to be treated as terrorists,” said an arrested lawyer while talking to The Dependent.

“House arrests with protocol, all facilities to run our everyday activities – even the ones for which we are charged – and of course requesting the UN for monthly stipends for us. I think our actions were horrific enough to merit all this,” another lawyer said.

“Personally, I’m really looking forward to my interviews on national TV. Also, I’d love to be invited by political parties for their rallies and even alliances. Can’t wait to be glorified on banners ahead of the next elections!” added another excited lawyer.

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The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.

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