(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
Model, actress Uzma Khan and her sister model Huma Khan cowardly caved in to just a little pressure, said Ahsan Saleem, a 35-year-old financial analyst who gets anxious when landing in the Pochinki area when playing Players Unknown Battle Grounds on his cell phone with his friends.
“I guess they didn’t have it in them, the guts and gumption that I expected them to have,” said Saleem, who says landing in Pochinki gives him palpitations because though there is a lot of loot there, it also has a correspondingly large number of other players landing there. “I guess people just project their own feelings on to others. I have guts and gumption, so I just expected them to have the same.”
Saleem – who if the construction workers in his street are playing cricket when he gets back from work, quickly dashes from his car to the gate to minimise his time outside the house – said that a good, solid spine is hard to find these days.
“Yes, yes, I know women aren’t even supposed to be brave as men, so not to compare myself with them but even if I were a woman…AAAH, get it out!!! Saima!!! Get it out of here!!!!!,” screamed Saleem to his wife upon seeing a lizard crawl in to the window of their bedroom.
