(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ISLAMABAD – Responding to pointless criticism leveled against him over the past week, Prime Minister Imran Khan has staunchly defended his decision to not wear a mask during his visit to the headquarters of the Inter Services Intelligence (ISI) on Wednesday.
Visibly breaching the Standard Operating Procedures (SOPs) of his own government, PM Khan said while talking to The Dependent that it is ridiculous to expect him, as an individual, to follow the rules and guidelines established by the government.
“Established SOPs? You know very well how the establishment works. You know better than to think that I have any idea what the government is going and what its SOPs are,” the premier said in an exclusive interview with The Dependent.
When asked, from a healthcare perspective, whether he should be wearing a mask to protect himself, the premier said this scribe was a moron of the highest order.
“Protect myself? How exactly would that work? It would be a lot more dangerous if I missed out on something. I have to accept whatever comes out of their mouth,” said a visibly helpless Prime Minister of Pakistan.