In keeping with his self-initiated tradition and diplomatic properness, PM Imran Khan received and drove the coronavirus from Islamabad National Airport to the arrival ceremony arranged for it at the Prime Minister House. Khan, who successfully sanitized the use of the more than half a million-dollar worth fully spec’d bulletproof Maybach S600 last year by gracing its driving seat with his presence, frequently drives around other foreign dignitaries around Islamabad showing off the parts he is allowed to show off.
Upon disembarking from the plane, the newly discovered lethal RNA virus that was received by almost the entire federal cabinet said, “I have been met with much hostility in other countries that I have visited, but the love shown to me by Pakistan is unmatched. Please, call me CVID-19; that’s what my friends call me”.
Strict security measures were put in place in the capital for the undisclosed duration of the official visit of CVID-19. Soon after its arrival an advisory was sent to all print and electronic news outlets to ‘report positively on the historic visit’, which is presumably an instruction to ignore the fact that the coronavirus has so far claimed 2,800 lives.
Speaking at a reception for the coronavirus hosted by president Arif Alvi, who was down with the flu and could not attend himself, PM Khan said that the world is misunderstood about CVID-19 and is therefore unwilling to give it an honest shot. Later, speaking to a group of foreign journalists, asking about the rising death toll at the hands of the coronavirus, the PM responded, “I have not read or seen anything about that so I can’t really say”.