Royal couple visits ‘Peshawar’ ruins | Pakistan Today

Royal couple visits ‘Peshawar’ ruins

The visiting Duke and Duchess of Cambridge on Thursday visited the ruins of an ancient, once-thriving city by the name of ‘Peshawar.’

“These are the ruins of a once mighty city,” explained Dr Faiza Khattak of the Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Archeology Department to the visiting royal couple. “It’s history goes back at least 539 BCE.”

“It served as the capital of the Kushan Empire, was sacked by the White Huns, before the arrival of Muslim and Afghan empires. The city was an important trading centre during the Mughal era before serving as the winter capital of the Afghan Durrani Empire from 1757 until the city was captured by the Sikh Empire in 1818, who were then followed by the British in 1849,” continued Dr Khattak.

“It weathered all these storms, this City of Gardens did,” she said.

“That is so interesting,” remarked Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton. “But what then became the cause of its eventual downfall.”

“Good question,” said Dr Khattak. “A collective known as the peetee’aaee, run by a charismatic leader (who was given to an addiction to the coca leaf) was installed in Peshawar by the Company.”

“This great Walled City, that had survived the battering rams of many a wandering army, finally succumbed to a crude technology called the bee’aartee, which ripped the city asunder,” continued a visibly moved Dr Khattak.

The Dependent

The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.



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