(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
NEW DELHI – Indian Air Force chief Rakesh Kumar Bhadauria on Friday commenting on the Mi-17 chopper crash on February 27, the same day as the dogfight between Pakistani and Indian jets, said ‘galti se mistake ho gaya’.
While addressing the press conference Bhadauria revealed how the Mi-17 was shot down by ‘Vasco da Gama ki gun’.
“Iss se nishaana lagaanay ki koi zaruurat nahi, naam lay ke fire kijiye theek nishaanay pe lagta hai,” the Indian air chief added.
Bhadauria said the target was missed owing to the cunningness of the opponents. “Kya hai na woh jo do number ka larka hai na,” he began after being interrupted by a phone call from the Prime Minister Office.
When asked what was said on the call, Bhadauria replied: “Kuch sunai nahi diya, lekin smart boy kaha hoenga zaruur!”
Bhadauria, who took charge as the Indian Air Force chief last week, said that the air force is also considering inscribing Pakistan Air Force’s name on its bombs and missiles so that the next time the IAF shoots down own jet it would appear as though the PAF has done it.
“Jaise do shikaari aik teer maartay hain,” Bhadauria said.
The Indian Air Force chief also complained to the Pakistani media and highlighted its role in aggravating war between the two nuclear armed countries through the portrayal of the leadership of the Indian armed force. “Aisa budhu, bewaqoof type ka kahay ko bataata hai?” he asked.
At press time Rakesh Kumar Bhadauria was kidnapped by Crime Master Gogo and taken to an undisclosed location along with Amar Manohar, Prem Bhopali, Karishma, Raveena Bajaj, Ram Gopal Bajaj and Shyam Gopal Bajaj alias Teja.