Chronologically unravelling Veena to start spewing venom against artistes-turned-bots in 2027 | Pakistan Today

Chronologically unravelling Veena to start spewing venom against artistes-turned-bots in 2027

(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

TIME MACHINE – Actor, cleric, reformist, nationalist, Twitter bot, Veena Malik will enter a new phase of her semi-autonomous programming in the year 2027, the time-travelling investigating team of The Dependent has revealed.

According to what the team witnessed as part of their excursion into the future, Veena Malik was seen crudely lambasting former actors who under the influence of the powers that be were forwarding a hypernationalist, bigoted, religionist narrative.

“(6/6) Last but not the least, those jingoists who were once doing the same things that they are vehemently condemning now, should know that Pakistan rejects them and their values,” read a tweet sent out by Veena Malik in a Twitter thread that she would go on to write on September 16, 2027.

Following their return from the future, The Dependent’s team of time-traveling analysts further revealed that the evolution of Veena Malik when plotted as a two-dimensional graph on the space-time axes revealed that the former actor now Twitter bot is actually ‘chronologically unravelling’.

“The evolution shows a pattern in the space-time dimensions and if we were to figure out the exact equation that Veena Malik is following as part of her chronological unravelling, we might be able to solve many secrets of the universe,” noted one analyst.

“At the very least, we should be able to solve the many secrets of the hybrid war that the powers that be are peddling in Pakistan,” the analyst added.

At press time Veena Malik was seen wholeheartedly condemning those former nationalists who had become ‘desi liberals’ under western pressure as part of the US-India-Israel agenda in the year 2035.

The Dependent

The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.



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