(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
An exciting new startup founded by LUMS grads is looking set to tech-disrupt the nation’s “toss” industry.
Shahmir Haider, Rafay Hassan and Zaryab Khan, with their app Flip-It, are swinging for the fences in the sector, which is estimated to rack up around Rs 300 every single year.
“We saw what the problem was,” said Shahmir. “Every day, lots of people, unable to choose between two equally good or bad options, are forced to ‘flip for it.’”
“Therein, we saw the opportunity. We knew that though the coin in question is usually promptly put back in the wallets, sometimes that coin is lost,” said Rafay Hassan. “A small percentage of a huge number is pretty large itself and we are a nation of 200 million people. Such cases within tosses come round to be around a total of three hundred rupees a year. We immediately saw this sector as ripe for a tech disrupt.”
“Our app can tell absolutely immediately whether we have a “chaand-taara” or the other one,” said Zaryab Khan. “Also has the option of giving a baadshahi mosque or Baba Quaid-e-Azam.”
Their LUMS incubation mentor was confident that they would get their funding from not just the varsity itself but also Punjab Government’s Plan 9. “All three of these boys scored high on the Backpfeifengesicht index,” said Dr Saleem Hassan.
Backpfeifengesicht is a German word roughly translating to “face in need of a fist.” Most startups, both successful and unsuccessful, are founded by individuals that have Backpfeifengesichts.
When asked about Flip-It’s path to monetisation, the founders were clear: “We don’t care. At the moment, we’re only about increasing the number of active users,” said Shahmir. “The mere fact that you even asked that if sign you are an old-fashioned fuddy-duddy who just doesn’t get it.”