(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
The nation’s Muslim community is to take out a march next month to highlight the various problems that the majority faces.
“It is about time that the problems of the majority are first acknowledged and then addressed,” said Orya Maqbool Jan, a popular Muslim rights activist who is organising the march.
“We have been ignored for far too long,” he said. “The public needs to realise what the green part of our flag represents.”
“It is very easy to forget the role that the Muslim community played in the creation of Pakistan. The founder of the nation? A Muslim. The poet-philosopher who thought it up? A Muslim,” he said.
“Despite all the odds, Muslims have also been successful in politics. Our first prime minister was also a Muslim,” he said.
“And the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, all the way till the 22nd.”
Elaborating on the demands of the march: “First of all, we need reserved seats in the national and provincial assemblies. Then, we also need job quotas in the various government departments.”
Jan is a busy man, as he is also going to organise a “Men’s March” to highlight all the problems that the men of the nation face because of their gender