When the going gets tough | Pakistan Today

When the going gets tough

  • Get a Life coach

Life always has a way of having a one up on you. You get stuck, you struggle, you find a way and just when you think you’re driving smoothly a narrow turn, a dead end, a hole appears from nowhere. What we don’t stop to think about is; life wants us to learn, unlearn and relearn. That’s the journey.

I must admit, I also had my share of pit stops and traps and eventually found myself in a pretty dark space. I fell and fell hard! It took me sometime to steady myself and look around. I realized — maybe a little late — this isn’t where I want to stay, neither is this who I want to be.

So slowly but surely, one small step at a time, I found my way. Although it was still dark, I imagined the light. I imagined it was coming from where I wanted to be. I followed it. It wasn’t easy, but perseverance is the key. So I kept walking, no matter how many times I slipped.

Once out in the light, basking in its warmth, I healed. I found myself at peace and reflecting at my journey. One thing I realis.ed was I had changed my set of beliefs to reach my goal.

I got a new pair of glasses to see the world. With this new set, I saw everyone was struggling, in work or in personal life, in relationships. So I decided to venture out in the not so scary big world and reach out. Becoming an enabler/facilitator to those who realized they needed a new pair of glasses too.

We all have heard the story about the coffee beans and carrots but let’s talk about onions. They are made up in layers. The outer most layers dries up and keeps the inside fresh and juicy and if you remove it the exposed inner layer will start drying up and keep the inner layers protected. We all have layers, the outer one rough and hard for the world to see and the inner one soft and emotional for maybe no one to see.

Now let’s get one thing straight, a professional coach is not your therapist or your consultant. A professional coach uses a process which transports people from where they are to where they want to be

We all have our fears hidden deep inside. We all have an inner voice telling us to stop or to move on or just keep doing what we are. It’s our way of protecting ourselves. But ask yourself this; protecting you from what?

Most of the time, the answer is pain or fear. These demotivating emotions block us. Drown us in their misery. While these emotions are completely justified, they are also the ones which hold us back.

Oftentimes even when we realise that we need to change or tweak out perspectives — a little bit here and there, we don’t know where to start or how to. Self -help books, help but then since we aren’t answerable to anyone we tend to fall back in old habits and end up with the mindset “This is who I am and I can’t change!”

Not a good thought; is it?

Here steps in a Professional Life Coach. Someone, I discovered, helps you grow and enables you to become confident, facilitates you to face your fears/thoughts/limiting beliefs. They even make you listen to that tiny shy voice inside of you- which you’ve been ignoring. A Professional Life Coach believes you have all the answers to your problems within you. You just need a nudge — maybe at times a shove too! — to acknowledge this.

Your coach will hold you accountable to your words. With the help of your coach you can strategise and map out a plan for your success.

Let’s just say the coach will act as a catalyst. For those not so good in chemistry a catalyst is someone (something) that causes a change without getting involved. You could also call them a spark plug — to get you going on your road to a better, happier and successful life.

Now let’s get one thing straight, a professional coach is not your therapist or your consultant. A professional coach uses a process which transports people from where they are to where they want to be. In the past “coaching” was used only in sports but these days it is used to support changes in peoples life.

Professional coaching is something which has to be experienced to know what it is and what it can do for you.

By now I’m sure the thought process must be “yeah so how important is it for me?” or “That’s just all moonshine — won’t work for me” but you see that’s the thought process you do want to change.

Instead ask yourself this: “If there is a100 percent chance that this might work for you; would you take it?”

Dania Ehtesham Zahid

The writer is an internationally certified NLP Life Coach, who has been coaching top executives in the Middle East to founders in Silicon Valley. Based out of Dubai, she can be reached at [email protected]



Top