(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ANKARA – The continued rule of Recep Tayyip Erdogan only became possible owing to the Khilafat Movement, Pakistan Prime Minister Imran Khan told the Khalifa during their meeting at the Royal Palace here on Friday.
PM Imran, who was on a two-day visit to the neo-Ottoman Empire on the caliph’s invitation, was warmly received upon his arrival at the palace at the dar-ul-khalifa. It is here that Khan was offered the position of the Khalifa’s wazir in neo-Pakistan.
Khan, who has already been appointed the Wali Ehed of Al-Bakistan by the Arabian Empire, the Huang Di by the Qing Dynasty, the Yang di-Pertuan Agong by the Malay kingdom, and the Guru Thoko Taali of Kartarpur Corridor, duly accepted Khalifa Erdogan’s offer as well.
However, Wazir Khan was quick to give Khalifa Erdogan a lesson in history.
“Your rule, this grandeur of the neo-Ottoman Empire, was only because of the successful Khilafat Movement that was launched exactly a 100 years ago in Pakistan,” Wazir Khan said.
“This was before neo-Pakistan and even a time period before purana Pakistan. This was qadeem Pakistan where the then youth of Pakistan orchestrated a tsunami against the corrupt British Empire,” he added.
“Your khilafat, your highness, and the return of the neo-Ottoman empire, is the result of that tsunami against the post-World War I patwaris.”