(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ISLAMABAD – After expressing regret over the assault of a private television channel cameraman at the hands of his security guards, former Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif expressed disbelief over the fact that he still has to offer explanations for the actions of those in-charge of security.
In a detailed one on one meeting with himself, a candid Nawaz confessed that he felt ‘those days were long gone’.
“One would’ve thought that after being ousted and disqualified for life I would perhaps be able to catch a break,” a very expressive Nawaz told an equally keen listener, while speaking to himself.
“Especially considering what I have been saying for 18 months, I thought those days were long gone. But hey, once a Prime Minister always a Prime Minister,” he added.
After a while, Nawaz’s conversation with himself eventually evolved into a heated round table conference.
“But still you have to give me the fact that I actually told the media that the behaviour of security guards has damaged my reputation,” an optimistic Nawaz said. “I can’t tell you the sheer number of times I have wanted to say that over the past decades.”
“Ah karma… once bitten twice shy,” a philosophical Nawaz said while expressing his innermost feelings to himself. “Except that I keep on getting bitten and am never shy,” a contrarian Nawaz clarified.