Desperate Asad Umer asks finance ministry officials to try turning economy switch off/on | Pakistan Today

Desperate Asad Umer asks finance ministry officials to try turning economy switch off/on

(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

The finance minister on Wednesday expressed his intention to try ‘whatever works’ to fix the national economy.

“To this end, I have directed the officials at the Economic Affairs Division to try to turn the economy switch off and then on,” he said, while addressing a press conference at PID.

“Listen, it works at times, don’t ask me why it works.”

“These things can be pretty mysterious and this whole off-and-then-on thing is one of the tried and tested methods of fixing things, everyone knows that,” he said.

“I also make du’a when I turn devices off and on and have directed everyone at the Division to do so.”

He also expressed his dismay that the ‘economy helpline people’ were not only unavailable but had also not given their number anywhere.

“But had we reached out to them, this off-on technique is something that they might have told my guys,” he said.

“I am a proactive guy, so I just went with trying this approach.”

The Dependent

The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.



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