(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ISLAMABAD – After finalising the first roll call of his cabinet, Prime Minister of Pakistan and Chairman of the Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaaf (PTI) Imran Khan has decided to reward loyal workers of his party in the second cabinet tier.
In this regard the first two appointments have been confirmed, with the headline appointment in the second cabinet tier being Zohair Toru, who has been appointed as a special adviser to the Prime Minister on Police Reform.
Toru has a decade long experience in data analysis on the subject, and is renowned as a motivational speaker. Many observers have credited him with initiating a revolution, and being the single biggest decisive factor in last month’s elections.
Toru, who is fondly known as ‘the establishment’ in Pakistan, has also been named the most influential political figure of the 2010s by Forbes Magazine.
Toru earned his striped fighting the police in the streets in the name of revolution. Following the revolution, he expected a role in the governing setup to bring revolution from within the government.
The second prominent appointment in the second tier of PM Khan’s cabinet is Farham Virk who has been awarded the portfolio of propaganda management.
Virk, a devout PTI supporter, is known internationally as a master of propaganda and impersonation on Twitter.
He has successfully impersonated as Rani Mukherjee, Ehsan Mani, Nelson Mandela, Jemima Khan, Abdul Sattar Edhi, Bono, Loch Ness Monster and himself.