(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
There was shock and confusion among supporters and leaders of the Pakistan Tehreek e Insaaf (PTI) alike as the $200 billion allegedly siphoned away by members of the Sharif family have not been returned to Pakistan despite Imran Khan having been officially elected Prime Minister for more than an hour now.
“I don’t understand what’s happening” said one die hard, self described ‘Insaafian’ in a tweet made an hour after Imran was announced as the Prime Minister in the National Assembly by Speaker Asad Qaiser.
“At first I thought the money would be back as soon as polling closed on July 25. Then I thought we would have to wait for Parliament to be in session. When it still didn’t happen, I figured it was because Imran wasn’t officially PM yet. But now. . . I don’t know what to think” said another Insaafian on the condition of anonymity.
“As you all know the $200 billion were stolen directly from the national treasury by Mian Nawaz Sharif and Mian Shehbaz with the assistance of Maryam Nawaz and all of the other patwaris” said PTI spokesperson Fawad Chaudhry.
“The money was taken in a typical patwari heist, and then stashed away in London. We had expected it back by now but unfortunately that is not the case. But we are working on it” he ended.
Another senior party leader, not wishing to be revealed, also told The Dependent that there were beginning to be doubts within the party as well now.
“We pretty much thought Khan sb would be elected and the money would just appear in the treasury” they went on to add.