(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
Bani Gala – The Pakistan Tehreek e Insaaf (PTI) Central Executive Committee (CEC) has said they are waiting on negotiations to end between Bushra Maneka and her Matka before they announce the names of people that will fill Imran Khan’s incoming cabinet.
“The first lady designate has been hard at work trying to cajole her matka into telling her who should fill the cabinet, but we have not had any results as of yet” said Fawad Chaudhry, speaking to The Dependent.
“Trust me she is working diligently. In fact, no one is allowed in the room where she is busy with the matka. But this is an inexact science, so we need to give her the time she needs for her to get the best answers” he went on to say.
When asked, Fawad Chaudhry confirmed that the Chairman Imran Khan had himself asked his wife to fish out names of cabinet members for him.
The Dependent attempted to contact Mrs Khan at Bani Gala, but our phone calls were not received and the reporter that snuck in was met with lots of incense and odd chanting that has scarred him so deeply he has not said a word since, and can now be found in a corner of the newsroom in the foetal position.