(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
SAINT PETERSBURG – Although Portuguese Cristiano Ronaldo narrowed the top scorer’s lead down to one in his side’s one nil win over Morocco on Wednesday, Veteran Own Goal remained top of the pile at the time of filing of this piece, and the early favourite to win the Golden Boot at this year’s FIFA World Cup.
With England’s Harry Kane having scored a brace in his opening match against Tunisia, Diego Costa scoring three in his first two matches and likewise Russia’s Denis Cheryshev who is on three goals after his side’s win over Egypt, the competition to become the tournament’s top-scorer will simmer till the very end.
But after the first week, it was Own Goal who demonstrated his wonderful finishing skills, by putting five at the back of the net. The decades old legend struck against Morocco, Australia, Nigeria, Poland and Egypt – a wide gamut of international sides – to put forward its stake to win the coveted Golden Boot.
It is pertinent to mention here that the World Cup legend Own Goal is only one strike away from matching its all-time highest tally in a single World Cup tournament of six goals, scored in 1998.
Reports suggest that should Own Goal win the Golden Boot, Liverpool legend Jamie Carragher will be summoned for the presentation.