(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer)
In a move that has shocked his fanbase, Dr Shahid Masood has declared he will resign if the world does not end in 2018.
“If the world does not end by 2018, and I mean really end, I promise I will leave my post at whatever channel I am employed by near the end of the year” read an official statement released by the Doctor’s office.
Dr Masood has been a veteran television commentator, and became infamous for his series about the end of time. However, none of his many predictions as to the approaching final days of the world have come true.
The announcement has left the Pakistani commentariat shaking with tremors as the world waits and watches whether this will be Dr Masood’s last year on TV.
In a seperate response, the government also announced that they would fully back the Doctors plans.
“I dunno. I get that it means the world ending, but I still don’t think its too big a price to see him resign” said Prime Minister Abbasi in a televised address to the nation.
Meanwhile, while many have been assuming that the statement came because Dr Masood was losing trust in his own abilities, he insisted to The Dependent that his wager was one of confidence, not frustration.
“Oh it is totally going to happen this year. Trust me, I’m an expert” he told this reporter, before whispering to himself “It . . . it has to. I mean come on, how much longer man?”