(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer)
In a strongly worded protest after a late lunch here in the Capital on Saturday, the nation’s uncles gathered to demand that they be explained what the hell is bitcoin thingamajig is.
Brandishing posters and chanting slogans, the uncles insisted that they be let in on whatever this was because they were “honestly feeling pretty left out guys.”
Lead by the All Pakistan Uncles Union (APUU), the protesters were of the opinion that if this stuff wasn’t operated using the internet, they would be totally on it already.
“At first I honestly thought it was just some new may-may or video game or whatever. But then people started saying it had something to do with money. That’s the moment I knew I had to know what it was” one protesting uncle told The Dependent.
“The problem is that this Bitcoin thing is on the internet. And honestly, we don’t normally bother with this stuff, but then there was this rumour that this batcoit thing is some sort of investment and that got us really excited” said Muhammad Arsalan, Chief saath-walay-uncle of the APUU speaking to The Dependent.
Elaborating on these demands, APUU General-Chachu Arshad Chaudry said that they were doing this for the betterment the “betas and betis” busy with this stuff.
“Look it’s simple, they explain to us what this is, and then we can tell them how they’re wrong and force them to make moves we think are right” he told The Dependent.
“Look, I’m a revolutionary” explained Waheed Jaffar, another protestor. “Property dealing is so yesterday’s news. If somebody can just explain how I recover my gmail password, I can get down to doing this” he added.
The protest had broken well before the filing of this report and the uncles agreed to grumble together about not being in on the loop next Saturday – before which The Dependent speculates the Bitcoin bubble will have burst.