New iPhone X comes with pre installed ‘regret at spending so much on a damn phone’ feature

In a revolutionary new move that has left their competitors on the tech market reeling at their tracks, apple has pre installed in the newly released iPhone X the ‘regret feature.’

The feature is meant to cater to people that buy the phone in a frenzy, check it out and see that it wasn’t worth the price tag, and immediately feel a pang of guilt and regret at, to quote apple executives, “spending so much on a damn phone.”  

According to users, this was a surprise feature nobody had been expecting before. It works in sync with the latest face recognition software that is being used in the phone.

“Everybody is saying different things, but there is a general idea of how the regret feature works” Marcus, a 23 year old who bought the latest iPhone despite being late on his mortgage payment and ‘I voted Bernie’ pin told The Dependent’s foreign correspondent.

The Dependent must clarify that all the details provided about Marcus were not demanded, but told to this reporter with vigour and an almost aggressive insistence.

“Basically what happens is that once you’re done exploring and you bring the phone up to your face, you see your reflection in the glass and you have this heavy feeling of guilt and stupidity, and yes, regert. All that goes through your mind in that instance is, damn, why’d I spend so much on a damn phone” added Marcus.

While users have generally mixed feelings about the self reflective properties of the feature, they all agree that it is indeed innovative.

“At least it has something genuinely new” said another quasi-satisfied customer.

Meanwhile, Apple executives told The Dependent that they felt the time was right for this feature to be brought out.

“Well this one does have a $1000 price tag. I know some people will say it’s early, but I think the world is ready for this” said Tim Cook speaking to The Dependent.

The Dependent

The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.



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